Just one more
I swear to God
Although I think
It's rather odd
I said the same thing yesterday
And here I sit--
Oh, wait, I stand
The bottle open
In my hand
I don't think
You will understand
So why don't you just go away?
Just something here
To ease the pain
To make me numb
To freeze my brain
Till I can't see
And I won't fear
The emptiness
That draws so near
That eats away
My inner soul
And leaves me
Shivring in the cold
Just anything to
Calm the growing
Fires of rage that
Are brightly glowing
The stench of
My lost innocence
Is louder now
Than I can bear.
It permeates the
breath I take
I swallow now
My body quakes
It's just one more
I had to take
To help me
soar into the air.
As silcence screams
Into the night
My loneliness alone
Takes flight
But soars right back
Into me right
Before I close the door.
And here I am
Just as before
I think I need to
Take one more.

Forgotten whispers echo silently
Buried in an avalanche of infinite darkness
Never to escape their icy tombs
Resolve to settle in for an eternity of night
Until flurries of time whisp through the memories,
Stir them...watch them float...let them settle once more.

Don't Wake Me Up

Whisful, and perhaps a bit foolish, I.
A dreamer, gliding down a foggy staircase.
Dewy gray mist of wonder before my eyes
Enchanted tinkling mystical chimes play in my head.
Makes me think of periwinkle and sugar gum drops
Sweet, silly fairytales, nursery rhymes...
Wings, marshmellows, rainy summer nights
When you can feel the aroma of the wind
As it glides across your face
Warm, soft cookies and a glass of cold milk
Down comforter fresh out of the dryer...
Distorted view of the world
And what it once was...
All that mattered.
What became of it?
What remains...?

cave

Just lie here for a little while
Don't be afraid -- indulge your urge
The demons with their crooked smiles
Lull you to sleep with your own dirge
And tell me now the whereabouts
Of your sacred secret catacomb
Where you go to leave yourself behind
When you feel the need to be alone
I've found the place that you abide
Your thoughts alone have let me in
This shelter where you run and hide
Ashamed of your own filthy skin
No time to lose now while we're here
Let's chase your furies down the hall
And don't forget your torch and spear
Our mission is to kill them all
The task at hand we consumate
Hear now the toiling of the bell
Complacent now to meet your fate
For all the roads here lead to hell.

Spit Me Out

Would you hate me if I told you I was angry?
I know you thought you'd keep me pacified forever.
I'm the one who's always s'posed to take the beating
Like it, shut up, be happy, take it again.
Can I get sick of being used
Or is that your exclusive right?
Mock my questions
Screw your answers
Don't you want me now that I'm not sweet?
Now that leave a bitter taste?
What's wrong, can't you find someone
To wash me down with?

Music of the Night

Wind whistling within the willow
Slowly silently slithering
Tremendous trees tower
Darkness descends deafeningly
Melodious music methodically
Lures lonely listless lovers
Glide gently gracefully
Into instrumental intercourse

Goodnight Kiss

Slightly intoxicated
By the taste of your lips
Breathless, you have stolen the air
Right out of my lungs

Tingling mixture of warmth and chill
Both at the same time
Completely enchanted by your touch
Wearing away at my skills of reason

You should, from now on, wear a shirt that says:
"Warning: May cause knees to weaken
Heart to flutter, and impare ability
To say goodnight and drive home."

Impossible

Try hard not to think a thought
Dream that you never dream
Or make a silent sound
Forget how to breathe
Clap with one hand
Cry without tears
Can you do it?
Love with
No fear.

Smoochin' on the beach

Incandescent shimmering whisps of moonlight
Swirl into synchrinization with the rhythm of the ocean.
Mezmerized, engulfed in deep crystal blue pools,
Liquid stars flow like silk through the abyss of night.
Warm summer breaths of sky caress smooth bare skin
And scatter my wind-tossed locks of golden hair across your shoulders.
Lingering touch, soft embrace, salty kiss of innocence
Two melt into one and I am captured.

Tragedy

Searching soul.
Plundering through an infinite web of mystery,
seeking to gather time along the way and failing;
The time is gone before it is gained.
No way to earn back the seconds spent like money on a Judas quest.
And what of your meaningless existence --
created to waste saline and tissues
over spilled words? We all have issues.
Too late to refuse to hear the lies.
Damage is done, and I lost the eraser.
Hold your breath, loose your grip
On reality to block out the pain.
Did you believe them?
If you do, it must be true...
Why is it such a tragedy to be you?

Say What?

Scattered thoughts collected,
I have it all together
A careless fleck of insanity
Mingled with poise.

Gleam in my eye
Can you see it?
Calculated spontenaity
Courageous fear to drown out the noise.

Answers to question
Lessons unlearned
Don't forget to turn the lights out
I'm afraid of the dark.

Engulfed in tranquil madness
Dried by waters of simplicity
Understood confusion,
Genuine synthetic spark.

Play

I can, when I close my eyes so tight
That images of color explode before me,
Still hear that song.
The one you played over and again
Until I cried
And begged you to reconsider.
Play me a song, play me for a fool, play it off,
But the game...
I just don't wanna play anymore.
Locked up tight in your palms,
So tight that your knuckles turn white
Is there a secret there that will escape?
Afraid of what it will whisper about you?
Complacent, melancholy, forgetful, and full of folly
Searing pain in my chest
Where the hole is that my heart once was in.
Put it back...pretty please? It's not your toy.
"What about the game?" you say...
I say...the game...
I just don't wanna play anymore.

Your Ticket

Muscles tense; inhale, release...
Lame, isn't it,
That I swab my tongue with xylocaine
To drown out the bitterness of you?
Greeted by smoke rings slithering across my skin (impressive)
Tingling, sickening, mortifying...and still I remain entraped.
Paralysed.
How did you find me?
I tried...so hard
Tiptoe softly across the hardwood floor
Lest the walls tattletale
Oiled the door hinges, darned squeaky door.
Should have bribed him too. (or killed him)
I thought surely I blended in well with the pattern on the couch
In your filthy den: mangled and faded -- worn.
Isn't that how you like me?
I protest -- detest -- the pleasurable wet warmth of your mouth...
Your weapon, your prize...and I kneel at your feet.
Abhoring and worshipping your holey socks
I am enchanting when I am at your mercy
Or did I transpose your words in my haste?
After all, you must speak slowly
In my inferior presence. S l o w l y...
Empty-headed freaks, cheery demons
Crack my window...tear off the shudders
Roll me in the molten wax
Scalding my wits, grinding my nerves...
And you laugh, sarcastically,
Amused at my feeble attempts to reconcile
My sense of shock -- or aftershock for all you care
For without my keen display of anguish
(Soley for your entertainment pleasure), what is left?
I hurt, therfore you are.

Skin Deep

To wax, or not to wax?
That is the question.
Whether 'tis noble to subject one
Of the human body's
Most fragile and vital organs (skin)
To scalding hot goo
For the sake of that
Silky smooth surface
Which mortals have so deemed
Sensuous...
To shave, or not to shave?
To run razor sharp, a blade of steel
Across the unsuspecting skin
To rid one of all unwanted,
Yet natural growth
Risking life and limb
And even much needed supply
Of blood...and for what?
Baldness???
To *pluck* or not to pluck...
Tear out, one by one
By the very root of their existence
Those pesky stray hairs that so
Precariously scatter themselves
And pop up in the
Most inconvenient of places --
Ripping them from their tiny folicles
And discarding them
As mere ashes to the wind...
'Tis a question that plagues
One that could cause
Even the soundest of minds
To go stark raving mad
With indecision
Anticipation
Of pain.
I ask you now,
Oh people:
Hair? Or Bare?

Sibling Rivalry

You smiled, though
I couldn't fathom
why. I didn't
feel a thing. Empty.
Swallowed by complacency.
I gasped, and the
numbness took hold.
Impossible, but the
corners of your
lips upturned further;
I wanted to be confused,
but couldn't muster.
Whisps of wind brushed
my cheek, but I only
knew because the lock
of hair stirred against
my skin. And you began
to grin. Teeth and
all. White where there
should have been color.
I could not recall the
emerald field, the blush
of rose. Where was the
essence of sweetness on
my toungue? I could not
comprehend the vast dark
swirls of ocean and the
roar of breakers' thunderous
crash. The warmpth of the
flickering flames dancing
atop the softness of the warm wax...
gone and forgotten.
Absence of the fragrance
of you. Turbulence raged
all about me, but I was still.
Did you speak at all?
I thought your lips moved...
How was I to know that you
wished me away with a single
breath? Blow out your candles
and watch me disappear.

Most of my older stuff is pretty dark, there...I just noticed that. haha.

But, you've been allowing us to see your journey to the light. Thank you for that. You have a great heart and a wonderful talent.

Thanks Michelle! You do have such a great talent, I just love reading your work!!

Took this one for a test run in GW...I thought it may have needed some reworking, but it seems to have been understood well enough.

Roadside Show

He would remain unseen through
his furtive night cloak,
but wide white eyes lined
with angry red tendrils betray
his position, drawing attention
to what the deluge of dusk
ardently conspires to conceal:
a haggard face redolent of disdain,
gnarled knuckes clenched bitterly,
deflated posture, and hunched back
draped in threadbare sweat soiled rags
that reek with fetid stench of
foolhearty ambition gone rancid
and carelessly squandered years.
Cracked, pasty lips part emitting
acrid, liquor-laced air;
his barely audible chants echo
eerily bouncing off rising steam
from heat-cracked asphault.
Head swaying back-forth, back-forth,
knotted greasy unkept braids
flail wildly in the air,
and his arms slowly, stealthily
creep upward as if to capture
the prey that only he can see.
The insane ritualistic dance
ensues until the fly, having
grown bored with his quarry,
abandons his current course
to pursue the nearest dung pile.
The tired transient closes
his once wide white eyes,
settling down with yesterday's
edition of the sports section
sheilding his nappy head
from the immenant attack
of nightly predatory bugs.

Forever Young

The glitter from her wings
Sprinkles throughout the air
And clings to everything
It touches.
I am struck with the thought that
The dust from mine
Most likely does the same.
The remnants I leave
In my wake long ago changed
From the sparkling, magical
Glimmer of fairy tales
To dull and lackluster
Spoor of sloughed off innocence
Unmet expectations
And harsh life experience.
Suddenly, I am slightly jealous.
But as I pout,
I wonder how could it be
That it is so easy for one to
Loose their whimsical youthfulness
Yet retain such a childish tendancy
As to sulk alone in the corner.
So now I think maybe
I have not forsaken Neverland--
Not completely -- and
While there is still just a gleam
Of hope to restore my former radiance
I sprint out into the yard
Leap into a pile of leaves,
Chase the "wishing flower" seeds
And turn a cartwheel (or two).
Ankle sprained, bottom bruised,
Eyes red from the pollen,
I retreat to the kitchen
Just in time to retrieve dinner
From the oven
Before it begins to look
Like the dust I tried to shake
From my wings.
Before I set the table,
I wipe glitter
From the placemats
And thank God
That He gave me
A fountain of youth
With plenty of sparkle to spare
Who will one day need
A good "dusting" of her own,
But for now, is quite content
To make little messes
And be fully confident
That I will come behind
To help her clean them up.
As I tuck my angel into bed,
I catch a glimpse of myself
In the mirror by her bed
And I see a twinkle.