I love this thread Ashley.

I hope you don't kiss your cat.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif"> -I tell my cat I love her, and she licks her butt. How nice. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">I love to partake in this sort of humor.

Yeah... I opened this reply box a million hours ago, and was going to reply but I forget what was said.

I think something from Eric?

Hi Eric.

This is my favorite...

From: Ignorantville, Georgia

-Yeah, so mom and I just had a conversation:

Somehow we got on my homosexuality belief.

Me: I know you think I'm just saying things to rebel. I'm not. It's just my opinions. Maybe they'll change as I experiance more but for now, it's how I feel.

Mom: Just let us be parents. We want to help you form your opinions.

Me: You can. I don't care. But if I don't agree with you, you have to let that be okay. Why can't we agree to disagree?

Mom: You just form way out opinions.

Me: To you they're way out. To me they're how I feel.

Dad: Well, to me I think that homosexuals are just too ugly to get the opposite sex. And you don't see that right now because guys are just attracted to you and you like that.

Me: I cannot believe you just said that. I'm not going to respond.

Dad: No. Respond.

Me: Yeah... Is this conversation done?

Dad: How would you feel if I suddenly started hanging around gay men?

Me: I'd be happy that you were in an enviornment with people who are different. It'd give you a better outlook, something to relate to, and some culture.

Dad: I'd feel uncomfortable. And so would your mom. And so would you.

Me: You're right. You know exactly how I feel.

Mom: Don't be a smart-[censored].

Me: Don't treat me like my opinions don't mean anything.

Mom: Look, I don't want to bring God into this because I know how you feel.

Me: Know how I feel?

Mom: About God.

Me: You know? Because I certianly have no idea how I feel. Could you please tell me?

Mom: Stop acting like that.

Me: I don't know where this conversation is going. I'm sick of talking about this. Can I leave?


-I think I got bit by a spider on my leg.

-Three boys just came to my house (One of them used to live with us) and they smelled like smoke. Ugh. I hate that smell.

-I'm moving to Japan.

Heh, Embie. You should come visit me.

You can watch the weekly trial of all black men and homosexuals.

Wow... your parents really do have strong opinions on homosexuals.

Too ugly to get the opposite sex?

LOL If they buy into all the other stereotypes... they should buy into the one that all the really good looking guys are either gay or married. LOL

Ashley - bless you for not believing everyone's opinions and trying to form your own.

You are a beautiful human being.

-Today was the suck.

-"The suck" is a new word. It means something that is so horribly bad, that it's the essence, the core, the creator of all things that are bad.

-Boy X- Yeah, so are we still on for tomorrow night?

Me: Yeah, not so much.

Boy X- Why not?

Me: Well, aside from me not being in the mood, I really don't feel like it's a good time. I mean, my parents and I have done nothing but fight and I don't really want to concentrate on a relationship right now when my home-life sucks so bad--I want to fix that before I commit to anything else---annnnd--I feel like it's way too soon after Chancey. I mean, I just got out of a relationship--a not so healthy relationship--and I'm not so sure I'm ready for another one so soon.

Boy X- How long did it take you to think up that speech?

Me: Um... Just now?

Boy X- That's fine... <refusing to look at me> Maybe some other time.

<Awkward silence... Me still standing there... Him pretending to be busy... Finally I exit stage right>

-Perhaps he's angry at me? Maybe he thinks I lead him on. Did I? I don't think so. He asked me out, I said "I'll consider it." (Exact words) I tell him later that he'll have to talk to my mom--and maybe that's when he thought my answer turned into a "yes." I feel like a royal wench.

-I ate healthy today. Aside from the donut in the morning--but I drank a whole lot of water--perhaps that flushed some donut out?

-I love it when people are rude to me for no reason. 15th customer complaint today.

Lady: Do you have an ATM Machine?

Me: Yes ma'am. It's on the registers--but you have to buy something.

Lady: <coldly> Then you don't have an ATM machine.

Me: Fine... We don't have an ATM Machine.

Lady: Excuse me?

Me: We have an ATM machine.

Lady: If you have to buy something it's not an ATM Machine.

Me: You slide your card, you put in your pin number, you get cash back--it's an ATM machine regardless of weather you buy something.

Lady: You're being very rude.

Me: So are you. Look, just because you're in a bad mood doesn't give you an excuse to put others in a bad mood.

Lady: Your job is costomer service. I ask you a question and you answer it.

Me: Did I not answer your question?

The lady mumbles something about a complaint--I see my manager talk to her--she leaves.

Manager: Another costomer complaint.

Me: Yeah...

Manager: <sarcastically> How many is that now?

Me: 15.

Manager: How long have you worked here?

Me: Nine months three days.

Manager: Hmm...

-I'm tired. I'm weak. I took a bath to make me feel better about a lot of things. I cried, because I'm just a raging sack of estrogen.

-I was stuck at work an hour longer. I called my mom and she said "Oh, sorry. We went to buy a car. Be there in ten minutes." Then she calls every five minutes to tell me that she'll be there in "five-more-minutes."

-Utopia has got to be the most boring book in the entire world--and I'm only on page 27. I find myself highlighting characters, places, and interesting statements just to keep up with the story.

-I will die of syphillis from the Ingles bathroom.

-I wonder if I'm always smiling. Today, when I wasn't smiling, everyone asked "What's wrong." I wasn't frowning, or angry looking... I just wasn't smiling. Hm. I'll have to notice.

-Classical music eases my soul.

-I talked to Crystal (my homosexual friend) today. I told her the trouble with my parents--with my family. She said they're stuck in their ways and they're just trying to hold on to their last child. There's truth to that.

-I realized today that I talk to myself... And I answer. Not aloud--in my head--that's how I think. I used to think in a jumbled mess. You know how you just think--you don't put words to it but you understand and when you try to put words to it, you can't? Well, I don't think much about things I can't put words to because it's just constant talking in my head.

-Mom: "Talk to me. You always talk to me. What's wrong? Did something happen at work? Why are you quiet? Are you mad at me?"

-Nothing to say--nothing to feel.

-My former stalker is stalking my friend. He bought her a pink rose, and left it for her in the office at school. What a cornball.

-Hmm. According to YM Magazine, I can tell how a guy is going to treat me in the future based on the way he sits. Yeah, I'm gonna have to call BS on that.

-So Chancey comes to see me at work and kisses me on the neck.

Me in my head: Hello, Mr. Neglectful. Oh no! There's a Chancey on my neck! GET OFF! GET OFF! GET OFF!

Me on the outside: Um...

-Sometimes the things that happen to me seem so unreal. It's like something you'd watch on TV. I should write a book. I wonder if I create this drama, or it just flows towards me.

-A few months ago mom walked into the house as I was holding an execution of all my barbies. I made a stand out of plywood I found in the garage, and stapled eight nooses to it and hung my barbies who were tied in electrical tape. My mom replied, "You are really really really messed up."

-Justin Timberlake has the straightest teeth I've ever seen. I wonder when he had braces.

-I wish an ice storm would hit, and we all would be stuck at home, and I'd trap myself in my room. My solitude would give me time to find myself.

-I wonder who the first person was to pick up a potato and say "Hm. I bet this tastes good."

-People irritate me.

-So this guy comes through my line with this shirt--it must have at LEAST a hudred holes in it.

Me: Woah. Run into a swarm of moths?

Man: No. This is my painting shirt.

Me: Oh...

-I almost shaved my toe off last night.

-Boys irritate me.

-I'm very moody right now.

-I've gone on speaking strike at my house. I figure if I don't talk, we can't fight. Instead, I nod if it's a yes and no question, and shrug if it's open ended, and sometimes I say "I'm fine," when they ask me what's wrong, or how I am.. I don't know if they've noticed yet. I started yesterday. This is my first act of rebellion. I'm slightly nervous to be honest. I wonder how it'll turn out.

-I accidently cut my wrist on a cabnet door. I think mom thinks it's intentional. I got a paper cut on my other wrist, and it's just too much of a coincidence, so I've been wearing long sleeves.

-I couldn't sleep last night, so I took some codeine. Does this mean I'm a druggy?

-Wow--those last three make me sound REALLY messed up. Erm.

-Dwight apologized for being such a jerk yesterday.

-Work wasn't so bad today.

-McDonalds makes great sweet potato pies.

-I feel like it's in issue that I can go into McDonalds, say "The usual," and they know EXACTLY what I'm talking about. I'm going to die of heart failure--or syphilis from the Ingles bathroom.

-I drank a million gallons of water--and peed out twelve million.

-I wish this day would end, and my feet would cease to hurt.

-Ingles is open on Thanksgiving.

-I worked 8 hours today... 8 hours yesterday--what nice paycheck that'll be.

-I wonder if I should go to sleep early tonight.

-Hm. Yeah, my parents noticed. My mom just yelled at me--and I nodded... and shrugged... and said fine... hm. She says I'm acting funny.

-She plays the guilt trip. It won't work. I hate it when she does that. It's so very annoying and manipulative.

-Lllllllaaaa... I want mashed potatoes for dinner, but I can't tell mom that because I'm not talking.

-What's love got to do, got to do with it?

-I'm having a giant pity party for myself. I think this is stupid.

-I need a bubble bath, and relax away my frustration.

-My parents traded in our mini-van for this ugly black car. I hate it. I have a complex about being below mailboxes.

-I like talking on the loudspeakers at work. It makes me feel all official.

-Today I'm tired.

Sounds like you are t-totally frustrated, when I get like that, i write, write letters to my mom or in today's world, my husband, and then store them but it helps to write it all down just like i would say it if i had the guts. Hey, dont pass on mashed potatos, tell her !

-Speaking strike is off. Mom's guilt trip worked. Tears and everything.

-Dwight apologized again for being a jerk.

-I'm not working on thanks giving.

-I went in to work to see my schedual, and saw my friend, Brewster. He told me I wouldn't see him for a week, so I ran up to him and hugged him tightly and kissed him on the cheek and told him to have a fantabulous time. Well, the guy in his line looked at me like I was a cheap ***** and then said something to the effect of white girls having no place being with black boys (He's not even black... He's... um... I don't know what he is. Maybe hispanic?). I shrugged and told him he had no place telling me who I can and cannot hug. The only thing worse than a racist is a bold racist.

-Why is make up so expensive!? And I don't even get that nothing-for-your money Mary Kay. You see... this is why men don't wear make up. There's no way they'd pay for it. It's us spendaholics that'll get it. *Sigh* Marketing sucks.

-This girl I know just got married. Want to hear how insane this is? She's 15. She's not pregnant. She's been going out with this guy for, get this, 2 months and 1 week! AND, her parents and his parents are okay with this. I talk to the guy, and he says he doesn't love her--it's just sexual attraction. CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT!?! I'm willing to put money on this being a failed marriage--the two aren't even out of highschool! Ack. No one will take that bet, though. That's CRAZY.

-My friend Haeli and I are going to see Harry Potter tomorrow, followed by some great girl shopping. Wahoo.

-SAT prep class is worthless! I'm angry that I'm taking it. So we've had this sub for the past two days. He gives us work, and none of us do it. Instead, I downloaded some music, and blasted it, wrote in my journal, talked online, and downloaded some grooooovy Simpsons sounds.

-I'm excited about Thanksgiving. Sweet Potatoe Casserole makes life worth living, and makes my heart LEAP.

-When I try to think of what heaven will be like, the glutton in me says it'll be a huge sweet potatoe casserole... <quivers with delight>

-Annoying boy hitting you in the back of the head... ...a mild headache.

Annoying boy verbally assalting you... ...hurt pride.

You punching annoying boy in the face... Three days In School Suspension and a parent phone call.

The look on his face when he realizes you broke his nose... Priceless.

-So I have three days In-school starting Monday. Big deal. He has four days for instigating, verbally assalting, hitting me in the head, and filling my bag with sugar. It's worth it.

-Or is this just giving mom another reason to put me in counsling?

-I tripped in the women's departement, and landed in a rack of bras. I think I may have punctured my uterus.

-I took a chem test today. Hope I make higher than an F.

-My GPA is slowly dropping with every day of Chemistry.

-Yeah... Let Thanks Giving break begin. No school for five days. A much needed break.

-I love my new friends. I couldn't ask for people who relate to me more.

-My family has this sick need to point out every roadkill animal they see. It's almost like a contest.

-I, on the other hand, like the "Yellow Car" game. You call "yellow car" if you see a truck, plane, boat, car, motorcycle, or van. It has to be smaller than a ryders truck (with exception of the plane) and larger than a bike, and there's only one type of Golf-cart that'll be accepted. Two points for every one you spot--first one to 20 points wins, but you have to call yellow CAR even if it's a plane.

-I might ask out Marlon... the only black kid in my school. He's way far out, and ever-so-sweet.

-I might ask Dwight out again too.

-I must go exfoliate my skin now. Ta-ta.

Heh...

I hate it when people ask for my picture online. Like I'm going to give it out to someone I've talked to all of 10 minutes.

Here's what I show them:
http://www.bozenka.tuke.sk/sante/ircop.jpg

I am dyin' over here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ROFLOLOL Where did you get my pic from??????


(I LOVE the inspirational stuff on the wall but what gets me rolling is the fan, that way he can get that evaporative cooling effect when that mouse clicking gets him overheated!!)


You are a RIOT

Ashley,

You are a hoot and I so love your posts.

I fear sometimes you've got alot of stress in your life. Such is the life of a teenager in Ignorantville, Georgia LOL. But hopefully the release of your thoughts here help.

Funny picture.

I saw that posted on a message board.

It was titled "Why Women Should Not Surf the Net". LOL

Yay! Someone replied to my livejournal.

Subject: Absolutely Amazing

This is amazing, as is your entire journal, and you yourself. I always
figured that there was more to you than you let on in the Novel Class,
but I had no idea of the extent of your brilliance. I know that must
sound really superficial of me, but I've come to assume, through
experience at the great institution known as NFHS, that people are
completely one-dimensional unless proven otherwise. You have certainly
separated yourself from the average with what you've written. I hope
that you're ok with me reading what you have here (Haeli told me about
it), but if you're not, e-mail me and I'll read no
further(skateandcreate1984@msn.com). However, I really do wish that
you'd share this side of yourself with the world a little more openly.
Sure, people might think you're wierd, but anyone who heckles you for
expressing yourself is the wierd one. Never be ashamed of your talents.
Keep writing, you're fantastic!

-Ryan King

And my heart leaps. This made my day--my socks are totally rocked off!

Yeah, my livejournal has become quite the popular item at school. I didn't know how many people were reading it--apparently, I showed my friends Haeli and Jennifer, and they showed their friends, who showed their friends... and they're impressed! And here I am just rambling like a moron and they think I'm great. Well... My day will be grand, now.

www.livejournal.com/users/shelteredashley

i like this post!

i'm sitting here with a cup of hot chocolate listening to some Audio Adrenaline...

for the first time in several weeks, i picked up a book and read it not for anything school related or homework crap! i'm estatic (sp?)!

i've been thinking. i dislike the way re-heated burritos from Taco Bell taste. i dislike frozen meat for that matter! and to add on, i dislike leftovers...YUCK!

The long awaited Winter Break has arrived. Yee-haw. Georgia, where it's cold enough to get snow, but never gets it. I feel like I'm being jipped somehow.

I failed my first class. Somehow, I feel accomplished. Is this a problem?

My friends and I went out and did some crazy things. We took the decorations off people's mailboxes and put it on their neighbors. And took a broken baby doll from reclaim and set it on someone's door step. All amusing things.

I think I'm hanging out with the "wrong crowd."

The other day, we went to Haeli's house and found that you can fit 7 people in her parents shower and 4 in her bath-tub--I split my pants in the process.

SAT Prep is over. Thank you Jesus.

Barns And Noble is the worst place to be on a Saturday morning. Ack. Don't ever do it. IT's like the ninth circut of hell.

Out of the 5 days of school this week--I've been to 3. Somehow I managed to be at the doctor twice. Once for strep, and once for a piece of drop ceiling that fell into my eye. Exciting, no? Only me.

Grandma is in town. Time for me to blow up the ol' air mattress, and hope to god the cats don't decide to sleep with me tonight.

If ever there is a day that I will forget highschool--I hope it is erased fully, and there are no shreds of scenes that play through my head.

I took up reading Harry Potter to get the horrid mental images that have been thrust into my mind by my family. It may very well be the best book I've ever had the pleasure of reading.

Looks like we're having a welfare chirstmas this year. I'm please. It'll teach us meekness. I should donate my gifts to the poor. What little gifts I get anyway.

Isn't it odd how no one feels like it's christmas?

Mom wants me to go to Christmas service. Ack. I should drink lots of coffee.

Alf. Who brought him out of the closet? I hate that stupid thing. Now he's doing collect commercials? Please. Someone bury him.

Have I mentioned how much I hate christmas lights? Or just the general holiday season. I took a quiz in my teeny bopper magazine. I'm "The Grinch." Splendid. Let me go rob the little Who's of their Christmas ham... Oh wait... I don't eat pork. But if I did, I'd go steal it. Mom is making a turkey for me. Anyway, back to the christmas lights. I hate that the rednecks have no true grasp of class. A strand of blinking, strand of solids, strand of chasing, strand of blue, strand of multi-colored, and a strand of blinking. One or the other buddy! Can't have 'em all!

If you converted all the christmas lights on my house to food, you'd have enough to feed a small country. It's like a winter wonder-land--with a waving Jesus and everything. I'm sure you can see my house from space. I have a hard time getting to bed at night because of the sun shining through my window. I'd put a pillow over my head, but I can't breath. If I turn on my hair dryer after the lights go on, all the power shuts off. My clock is still blinking 12:00.

You're a mean one... Mr. Grinch.

You know, if Santa really did exist, there'd be at least one punk that'd give santa a laxative cookie, and he'd have to go home early. Needless to say, that kid would get a big bag of charcoal the following year--but that doesn't mean it wouldn't happen.

I've been to 14 movies since June. That seems like an awful lot, doesn't it?

I've read 21 books since June. Hm. Speak and Harry Potter were the best. You should consider reading them.

Ack. Boys are such perverts. They should all be locked in a tower, and only be used every now and then for reproduction, and then after, promptly sent back to their cage.

Okay... not all boys. Just most.

My stomach hurts. I think I'm going to go eat a rice crispie treat to make me feel better.

As always you brighten my day thanks..have a wonderful day..

You know how you go into a public restroom and the integrity of every stall has been compromised so you have to pick the least disgusting one? That's how I feel about dating.

You know the guy who sells you tickets at the movies? I bet you could kill him by covering up that little slot... I got some gift certificates for the movies... I'll have to try it.

Having a smoking section in a restaurant, is like having a peeing section in a pool.

Soap operas just seem so dumb. I've watched four or five since I've been on break and they're all dumb. "After I marry him, I'm going to kill him and take all of his money, and then you and I can get married. But after that, I'll kill you and marry your long lost twin brother." Ack. Stupid.

Reese Witherspoon is the cutest little thing to hit Hollywood. I appreciate her.

My feet are cold and it's time for the After-Christmas sales! Kholes, here I come!

Momma put bananas at the bottom of her banana bread. It's all mushy and brown, now. I feel like this is an issue.

Turns out I didn't fail Chem. In fact--I made an 82. Hm. I wonder how that worked. I don’t' recall any bribes I made.

I'm now taking Agriscience. You know, the science of Agriculture? Yeah, my teacher--Mr. McGee--is far too excited about soil. The first day he asked, "What is soil?" to which I replied "dirt?" and then he yelled and said "NOOOOOOO! Absolutely not! This lady's answer is a prime example of what will get you a big fat F on your tests. Soil is dirt? That statement is an abomination! Soil is not dirt! Soil is a dynamic median used primarily for plant growth! You have a lot to learn young lady." I sat stunned, wondering where the nearest mental ward was. He is certifiably insane. We could take him to the ward, and they'd admit him, no questions asked. And his face gets all red and veiny when he talks. Very frightening man.

My Algebra II teacher looks like Lord Farquaad from Shrek.

I got PDA (Public Displays of Affection). I hugged Jason, as I hug all of my friends and Mr. McGee almost had a seizure. I hug all my friends all the time, but apparently this is a crime worthy of detention at NFHS. I went to see my administrator, and he said it wasn't a big deal, and would let me off with a "warning," as long as I promised not to do it in front of Mr. McGee anymore--and then he gave me a hug. Odd.

Mom making egg salad is the WORST smell in the entire world.

I wonder why we have desks. School would be so much more fun if we could sit in beanbags on the floor and bear down on books. It would be a great group setting and we’d all be much more comfortable.

Hi-ho—hi-ho—it’s off to Ingles I go… G’bah.

-Why couldn't I get into the site for a week? It made me very sad.

-I am dating the most amazing guy I have ever met. Ever. This one is a keeper. And... he's way cute. I would like to marry him and have all of his kids... just--not tonight.