Howdy folks ) well ... i do believe that its been almost a good 4 years or so since I have written in the forums and I was asked or...challenged should I say to bring back the topic of women persuing men.

Well, the confusion is over for me as anyone might have seen from my last posting on this topic. I am engaged (not to the guy whom i was writing about) and have never felt so confident that he is God's chosen one for me. Over the years I have dated plenty of guys all of whom I have felt deeply for ..but it has taken me a long time to learn that ITS BETTER TO LET THE GUY PERSUE!!!!!!!

Girls, DO NOT BE MISLEAD BY YOUR HEART!!! I am saying this because I love deeply and I know how hard it is to stay quiet about how we feel.... not that we have to stay quiet but for the first time in my life I have tried things differently as far as dating goes. All the other relationships failed because I dove in too quickly.

Russ and I started dating quite a while ago and it didnt take long for me to fall in love with him. I decided that I was going to try the dating thing a different way. I was going to let Russ and God make all the moves. It was the right thing for me to do because the more time Russ and I spent together the closer we got and the more he made all the moves. It was torture for me because Russ moves slow (which is good because it was a lesson in PATIENCE for me) and i wanted to tell him i loved him everyday.
Russ plays lead guitar in a touring band and he was on a 3 week run which was hard because i missed him alot. He called me out of the blue to just say 3 words i never thought I would hear FIRST. "I LOVE YOU ERIN GRACE". Of course I cried like a baby because I knew right then that this was the first time a guy had ever truely loved me back.

Dont be discouraged if you are single ladies. If this whole dating thing can work out for me, it totally can work out for you. Dont think im saying that by persuing men relationships dont work out. I know that it can. But if you have tried relationships over and over again like I had done, try something new and let the guy lead. It took alot of time for God to put the right guy in my life but this whole journey has made me stronger.

My advice ends with this :Let God move no matter what. Sometimes we want things to happen too quickly especially in the times we are in right now. When i decided to take love slow, it worked. And it was the only time it ever worked. So..not to say that all the other ways dont work...but to say that I encourage GOD MOVEMENT and not OUR MOVEMENT.

I think thats all I have to say about that....

yes, been there too. trying to make things happen. its also environment for me how or if I approach or not. if its not working, try the opposite. Id prefer to be pursued , with womens lib-even christian men dont know how to approach us or when. also, sitting back can make a girl look like shes waiting by the phone and no one ever calls. men dont want a chic who has no life of her own, they want us to be self supportive and support them too now. assertiveness can be seen as confidence. how do we know which ones are impressed and who wont be? so what then? Im not patient, but have been goin on 3yrs and no one has pursued me yet[not from a church]. at 33, thatgets old and so am I. AND IF YA DONT GO TO BARS AND ONLY WORK WITH WOMEN[IF WORKING ANYWHERE, IM SEARCHING]. CHURCH IS ALL THERE IS. darn caplock, sorry. but i do know what you said can be true for others. married men approach me, but i dont go there. i dont like to share.

Wow, Erin...great to see you! Yes, I believe men should pursue the women. I'm just old fashioned like that.

old fasioned here too. have been known to chase on occasion in past. but if theyre that into me, let them pursue, that way-less guesswork! [; less humiliation too.

Women can do the pursuing, but it's kinda like working in the hospital with doctors, you gotta make them think it's their idea if you want a positive reaction

thanks for the tip! [;