*************WARNING PG-13*****************

A little off-color, alot not Christian, hugely funny for those needing a lift...

When you are blue, ...I'll try to dislodge whatever is choking you.

When you smile, ...I'll know you finally got a little.

When you are worried, ...I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be and to quit whining.

When you are confused, ...I will use little words to explain it to your dumb [censored].

When you are sick, ...stay away from me until you're well again. I don't want what you've got.

When you fall, ...I will try to keep from laughing.

This is my oath, I pledge 'til the end. Why you ask?

Because you're my friend.