TOP TEN "BIBLICAL WAYS" TO FIND A MATE
10. Find a prostitute and marry her. (Hos. 1:1-3)
9. Play Peeping Tom with the neighbor's bathing wife. Order her and have her delivered like pizza. (David, 2 Sam. 11)
8. Go to a party and hide. When the women come out to dance, grab one you like and carry her off to be your wife. (Benjamites, Judg. 21:19-25)
7. Find a man with 7 daughters, and impress him by watering his flock. You will get his daughter's hand in marriage for your trouble.
(Moses, Ex. 2:16-21)
6. Even if no one is out there, just wander around a bit and you'll definitely find someone. It's all relative of course. (Cain, Gen. 4:16-17)
5. Become the emperor of a huge nation and hold a beauty contest. The winner is your wife.
(Xerxes, Est. 2:3-4)
4. Agree to work 7 years in exchange for a woman's hand in marriage. Get tricked into marrying the wrong woman. Then work another 7 years for your bride. That's right, 14 years of toil for your wife. (Jacob, Gen. 29:14-30)
3. Purchase a piece of property and get awoman as part of the deal. Price includes tax, title, and license. (Boaz, Ruth 4:5-10)
2. Have God create a wife for you while you sleep. Note: this will cost you.
Adam, Gen. 2:19-24)
1. When you see someone you like, go home and tell your parents, "I have seen a woman; now get her for me." If your parents question your decision, simply say, "Get her; she's the one for me." (Samson, Judg. 14:1-3)